Slipping

I’m convinced
That you can never fully regret
Loving someone
Regret doesn’t exist in wholes
It exists
Only in pieces
That don’t quite make up the whole
I think that’s the worst part
About regret
It leaves cracks
Holes
Spaces
Memories untouched
No matter how much you want to fully regret it
You can never manage to keep your balance
When you slip
Into one of those cracks
That you forgot existed
Love always seeps through
And it sucks you in
And every time you slip
You create an earthquake within
Your heart
And the cracks become wider
And wider
And that’s regret
It will never exist in wholes
No
It’s not going to let you off that easy
The cracks stay
And the memories linger
And you have to master the art
Of balance
So that you learn to catch yourself
The next time you stumble upon
A crack

Collision

I could feel the human connection we created
His gaze had met mine
But not for the first time
I wouldn’t call it fate
Or even attraction
Just the curiosity of two souls intertwined
A curiosity that is revived
With each shared glance
I enjoy those moments
So transparent
So real
It is in those genuine looks
Shared by two strangers
That I feel the truly human connection
Of two hidden souls colliding
Just for an instant

A Giddy Infatuation – The Emotions That Come With Having A Crush

It’s the first encounter – the first glance, that gets you all sorts of messed up. Their movement, their expressions, simply their being captivates you for some inexplicable reason; it’s like hearing that new song on the radio for the first time, so mesmerizing and so…you. For those next few days, weeks, months even, that song is stuck in your head, constantly on replay. Each time that sweet, now familiar melody comes on you light up like an overjoyed kid on Christmas morning. And every time you see those alluring eyes, which scarcely know your figure at all, you feel as if you’re looking at a long lost lover. Excitement rushes through your body as you try to contain those strange feelings of infatuation, attraction, wonder, and awe that surge your thoughts. But it’s funny, because as you feel these things, those alluring eyes turn in your direction, and your seemingly ordinary eyes dash to the floor, suddenly glossed over with a look of indifference. If only they knew.

But this pattern of emotions continues for a while, and those desired feelings that were once so riveting become intertwined with sadness as you are overcome by the reality of the impossibility of your two worlds ever colliding. It’s strange, however, because while your emotions are tainted with pain, those feelings of joy and giddy infatuation don’t quite disappear. In a paradox of emotions, you seem to question your worth. You ask, “What do I have to do for them to like me? Why can’t I ever find someone who feels the same riveting feelings that I do? Am I lovable? Why are their eyes so indifferent toward me?” But then, suddenly, as if you’ve been hit by a train of realization, you remember your eyes, and the indifference they lied about. And then you think to yourself, hesitant yet spirited, “What if their eyes are lying too?”